DIY History | Transcribe | Iowa Women’s Lives: Letters and Diaries | Eve Drewelowe's journals, volumes II-III, 1950s

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Eve Drewelowe's journals, volumes II-III, 1950s

Page 055

of distress. One such might greatly disturbed because I had vomited a bit of blood. I rang for the house nurse. She came but she knew so little to do. She however, quieted and back to bed thinking perhaps after all my imagination had deluded me. It is highly improbably that it did for I have extraordinarily good vision and lucid imagery. It never has been known to play tricks on me. I wish I might say as much for any other mental processes.
Another day; another test. This time Dr Alvarez gave me some capsules to try out. I was to take one at bedtime. Then he went on to tell me exactly how the capsule contents had been designed. It isn't a pretty story and I can't recall the exact words but in substance it went something like this. A cat had been crazed by teasing. In the course of crazing, I understand, some portion of the poor animals brain was effected. Then a combination of substances or drugs had been devised to disconnect that part of the brain so effected. Thus the animal had again been restored to sanity.
I took the capsules thinking no more of it, with my other indications and bedtime feeding. However the gruesome story of the poor each pushed itself forward and my compassion got the better of me. How cruelly the poor animal had been tortured. The story stalked me into sleep. Finally, however, I was off to dream - laid only to awaken with ghastly pain, form a hideous nightmare of 12:30 am or 1:00am. I never have nitemares, I was terrified! In my disturbed state of mind. I called Clinic emergency and the night operator got Dr Alvarez on the wire. He was very kind and told me what to do and take but I was quite perturbed to have resorted to disturbing his night's rest. He was very nice about it.

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of distress. One such might greatly disturbed because I had vomited a bit of blood. I rang for the house nurse. She came but she knew so little to do. She however, quieted and back to bed thinking perhaps after all my imagination had deluded me. It is highly improbably that it did for I have extraordinarily good vision and lucid imagery. It never has been known to play tricks on me. I wish I might say as much for any other mental processes. Another day; another test. This time Dr Alvarez gave me some capsules to try out. I was to take one at bedtime. Then he went on to tell me exactly how the capsule contents had been designed. It isn't a pretty story and I can't recall the exact words but in substance it went something like this. A cat had been crazed by teasing. In the course of crazing, I understand, some portion of the poor animals brain was effected. Then a combination of substances or drugs had been devised to disconnect that part of the brain so effected. Thus the animal had again been restored to sanity. I took the capsules thinking no more of it, with my other indications and bedtime feeding. However the gruesome story of the poor each pushed itself forward and my compassion got the better of me. How cruelly the poor animal had been tortured. The story stalked me into sleep. Finally, however, I was off to dream - laid only to awaken with ghastly pain, form a hideous nightmare of 12:30 am or 1:00am. I never have nitemares, I was terrified! In my disturbed state of mind. I called Clinic emergency and the night operator got Dr Alvarez on the wire. He was very kind and told me what to do and take but I was quite perturbed to have resorted to disturbing his night's rest. He was very nice about it.