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Phanny, v. 3, issue 4, Spring 1945
Page 2
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2 PHANNY 2 establish the falsity of that learned gentleman's pet theory. This fact, however, was not forthcoming until some two centuries after J. P.'s history-making voyage, by which time the famed philosopher and astrogator (not a young man, even at the time of his justly famous intergalactic journey) was somewhat past his prime. Therefore, when it was established that these monstrosities, far from being the mindless beings he had supposed, were in actuality beings of pure mind-force, incalculably beyond the human level, and that they had adopted their highly individualistic, completely disfunctional anatomical forms for purely aesthetic reasons, it was a hard blow to the man. And so it was that Josepho Phanno came to propose his altogether delightful theory of the formation of the Milky Way. Said he, "Orion, during the course of one of his nightly prowls, came upon Maia (one of the beautiful Seven Sisters) with intentions strictly dishonorable, while the maiden was engaged int he plebian task of milking a cow--none other than the favorite mate of Taurus. But Maia was displeased by the uncouth manner of his approach, and threw the half-filled pail at the lumbering giant. Never having played soft-ball with a Twentieth-Century girls soft ball team, Maia naturally missed--and the bucket went spinning end-over-end, spillingthe milk in a graceful arc of shining droplets across the sky." J. P., as befitted a giant of science, spent his last days in restful solitude, his every want cared for by efficient, smiling attendants in shiny, white uniforms. --:o0o:--- At the beginning of "By Their Works Ye Shall Know Them," it is stated that suggestions for Laureate Awards for the Winter Mailing will be found at the end of the Reviews. That ain't so. The suggestions are right here. EDITING AND PUBLISHING: 1, Ashley (En Garde) 2, Searles (Fantasy Commentators) 3, None. -- ARTICLE: 1, Triple Standard (Davis, Fan-Tods) 2, Time and the Expanding Universe (Tanner, En Garde) 3, Blue Print for a Vested Interest (Gardner, Yhos). -- FICTION: 1, Ripening (Rothman, Milty's Mag.) 2, The Thing in the Parlor (Wolheim, Phantagraph) 3, Lowndes (Trigger-Talk at Green Guna, Agenbite of Inwit).-- HUMOR: -- 1, Yerke (The Bedside Fassbeinder) 2, Stanley (Yesterday's 10,000 years, Fan-Tods) 3, Ashley (Forgotten Fantasies, En Garde). --ART: 1, none, 2, Watson (Front cover, Toward Tomorrow) 3, Alvas Rogers (Back cover Toward Tomorrow).-- POETRY:-- 1, none, 2, Kajperooni (Prayer, Yhos) 3, Lowndes, (Annals of Arkya, Phantagraph). -- BEST IN MAILING: -- 1, Fan-Tods, 2, "Time and the Expanding Universe," 3, Sardonyx. ---:o0o:-- Fern's report came as very much of a surprise to me. I'm still very much in the dark, even after the "explanation" in FNC, which successfully cleared up most of the reason back of the delayed mailing, but did little else. The announcement of VAPA shortly thereafter was, of course, unsurprising. ---:o0o:--- "Sell Me A Ticket, Mister" "Sell me a ticket, Mister. I'm tired of seeing A human being On every foot of space; I'm tired of the sight Of artificial light-- I want to see the stars! Sell me a ticket, Mister. I want to stand alone Where the thin winds moan Across the desert's face; I want no more of men-- I want to live again-- I'm going home--to Mars!" --D.B.T.
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2 PHANNY 2 establish the falsity of that learned gentleman's pet theory. This fact, however, was not forthcoming until some two centuries after J. P.'s history-making voyage, by which time the famed philosopher and astrogator (not a young man, even at the time of his justly famous intergalactic journey) was somewhat past his prime. Therefore, when it was established that these monstrosities, far from being the mindless beings he had supposed, were in actuality beings of pure mind-force, incalculably beyond the human level, and that they had adopted their highly individualistic, completely disfunctional anatomical forms for purely aesthetic reasons, it was a hard blow to the man. And so it was that Josepho Phanno came to propose his altogether delightful theory of the formation of the Milky Way. Said he, "Orion, during the course of one of his nightly prowls, came upon Maia (one of the beautiful Seven Sisters) with intentions strictly dishonorable, while the maiden was engaged int he plebian task of milking a cow--none other than the favorite mate of Taurus. But Maia was displeased by the uncouth manner of his approach, and threw the half-filled pail at the lumbering giant. Never having played soft-ball with a Twentieth-Century girls soft ball team, Maia naturally missed--and the bucket went spinning end-over-end, spillingthe milk in a graceful arc of shining droplets across the sky." J. P., as befitted a giant of science, spent his last days in restful solitude, his every want cared for by efficient, smiling attendants in shiny, white uniforms. --:o0o:--- At the beginning of "By Their Works Ye Shall Know Them," it is stated that suggestions for Laureate Awards for the Winter Mailing will be found at the end of the Reviews. That ain't so. The suggestions are right here. EDITING AND PUBLISHING: 1, Ashley (En Garde) 2, Searles (Fantasy Commentators) 3, None. -- ARTICLE: 1, Triple Standard (Davis, Fan-Tods) 2, Time and the Expanding Universe (Tanner, En Garde) 3, Blue Print for a Vested Interest (Gardner, Yhos). -- FICTION: 1, Ripening (Rothman, Milty's Mag.) 2, The Thing in the Parlor (Wolheim, Phantagraph) 3, Lowndes (Trigger-Talk at Green Guna, Agenbite of Inwit).-- HUMOR: -- 1, Yerke (The Bedside Fassbeinder) 2, Stanley (Yesterday's 10,000 years, Fan-Tods) 3, Ashley (Forgotten Fantasies, En Garde). --ART: 1, none, 2, Watson (Front cover, Toward Tomorrow) 3, Alvas Rogers (Back cover Toward Tomorrow).-- POETRY:-- 1, none, 2, Kajperooni (Prayer, Yhos) 3, Lowndes, (Annals of Arkya, Phantagraph). -- BEST IN MAILING: -- 1, Fan-Tods, 2, "Time and the Expanding Universe," 3, Sardonyx. ---:o0o:-- Fern's report came as very much of a surprise to me. I'm still very much in the dark, even after the "explanation" in FNC, which successfully cleared up most of the reason back of the delayed mailing, but did little else. The announcement of VAPA shortly thereafter was, of course, unsurprising. ---:o0o:--- "Sell Me A Ticket, Mister" "Sell me a ticket, Mister. I'm tired of seeing A human being On every foot of space; I'm tired of the sight Of artificial light-- I want to see the stars! Sell me a ticket, Mister. I want to stand alone Where the thin winds moan Across the desert's face; I want no more of men-- I want to live again-- I'm going home--to Mars!" --D.B.T.
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