DIY History | Transcribe | Hevelin Fanzines | Chanticleer, v. 1, issue 3, December 1945

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Chanticleer, v. 1, issue 3, December 1945

Page 6

4. The lovers quarrel, and, in round 4, Bernetha gently pops Tane on the noggin with an anvil.
a. Bernetha goes home to father. (Mother's a welder at Lockheed.)
b. Tane seeks solace in the North Woods, comes home to find it in the bath tub.
c. Tane realizes he cannot do without his Joy Bernetha Bushes.
d. Your readers realize that something is up.

5. The beginning of the end.
a. Bernetha flys to Tane.
b. Bernetha spots Tane in the hammock.
c. Bernetha chases Tane.
d. Tane runs.
e. Bernetha hurries like all billyhell.
f. Tane slows down.
g. The lovers are united in

-o- THE END -o-

THE EDITOR'S NOTES TO YOU:

Once again we have been fortunate in obtaining a manuscript from J. Wontford Laydschur, that vitroilic raconteur on the solid side. My Laydschur's next lesson, taken from his book "Tomey Touches for Authors with Crutches", will be "At Bay With the Girl Intern, or How to Write Soap Operettas in Three Easy Box Tops". Be sure to reserve your copy of the next issue at your nearest barber shop. My Laydschur will discourse at length on the following:

1. The salvation of dirty people - the soap opera.
2. How to kill off your heroine when your Crosby rating hits zero.
3. Selling soap bubbles by extolling troubles.
4. The hospital and soap chips.
5. The commercial uber alles.

Reserve your copy now, and assure yourself a treat.

MINERVA IN SEPTEMBER
-- Charles R. Tanner

i uttered guff i muttered gull / 
when i was rather oung and sprang / 
i gabbled furm i babbled stull / 
nor kenned that i was purdy rang

till chance and vance oercame my keen / 
and scarmed with mony a ha and hiss / 
i get it now my opes are een / 
and i can dish out stuff like this /

Saving...

4. The lovers quarrel, and, in round 4, Bernetha gently pops Tane on the noggin with an anvil. a. Bernetha goes home to father. (Mother's a welder at Lockheed.) b. Tane seeks solace in the North Woods, comes home to find it in the bath tub. c. Tane realizes he cannot do without his Joy Bernetha Bushes. d. Your readers realize that something is up. 5. The beginning of the end. a. Bernetha flys to Tane. b. Bernetha spots Tane in the hammock. c. Bernetha chases Tane. d. Tane runs. e. Bernetha hurries like all billyhell. f. Tane slows down. g. The lovers are united in -o- THE END -o- THE EDITOR'S NOTES TO YOU: Once again we have been fortunate in obtaining a manuscript from J. Wontford Laydschur, that vitroilic raconteur on the solid side. My Laydschur's next lesson, taken from his book "Tomey Touches for Authors with Crutches", will be "At Bay With the Girl Intern, or How to Write Soap Operettas in Three Easy Box Tops". Be sure to reserve your copy of the next issue at your nearest barber shop. My Laydschur will discourse at length on the following: 1. The salvation of dirty people - the soap opera. 2. How to kill off your heroine when your Crosby rating hits zero. 3. Selling soap bubbles by extolling troubles. 4. The hospital and soap chips. 5. The commercial uber alles. Reserve your copy now, and assure yourself a treat. MINERVA IN SEPTEMBER -- Charles R. Tanner i uttered guff i muttered gull / when i was rather oung and sprang / i gabbled furm i babbled stull / nor kenned that i was purdy rang till chance and vance oercame my keen / and scarmed with mony a ha and hiss / i get it now my opes are een / and i can dish out stuff like this /