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Tess Catalano assessment of Take Back the Night event, 1982

Assignment #2 Page 3

property) against abuse. Liken it to sexual vandalism. Your property has been damaged. You feel like the monster (you helped create) has turned against you, and you are helpless and angry. OK. Maybe that was too harsh. You do feel sadness and anger about the fact that your golfing partner raped your daughter at the christmas party, but he is your boss. You really are helpless. Yu do need your job. You are angry that your daughter has suffered, but... Your suffering is secondary. Her suffering is primary. She is bruised between the legs and can't sit down for long periods of time. She is frightened of boys at school. She can't sing in the church choir any more because the rapist faithfully attends every sunday. She always wants someone with her (a woman) when she goes downtown. Sure, you feel angry. But that is all you feel. 
   Always someone will raise the issue of men as victims of sexual violence. It does happen. But it is different. I challenge you to find the man who suffers the same mental, emotional, and physical agony that a woman feels. Most male rapes happen between men. Usually it is a straight man raping a gay man, to prove his hatred of queers, to dominate, to ensure his own almighty and all power-ful masculinity. Rape is power and the powerful rape the weak. Men are rapists, and rapists are men. Women are not the ruling sex, we are the oppressed. To focus disproportionate time and attention on the sexual abuse of men is to minimize the reality of the 100's and 1000's of women assaulted each day. To address the issue of women raping men is absurd. It is continued effort to deny men's complicitousness in the sexism which produces crimes against women. 
   You say that you are not a rapist. You do not rape. But you may tol-erate sexist jokes. You may buy pornography, You may interupt a woman at a meeting, you may scoff at the attempts of feminist to hold a rally, you may demand that your (do you own her) girlfriend not go to that rally. And I say where do you draw the line? Can she go to a support group? Can she go to a self-defense class, to volunteer for the rape crisis line. Can she go shopping alone? Can she vote? Just what exactly can she do? With or without your

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property) against abuse. Liken it to sexual vandalism. Your property has been damaged. You feel like the monster (you helped create) has turned against you, and you are helpless and angry. OK. Maybe that was too harsh. You do feel sadness and anger about the fact that your golfing partner raped your daughter at the christmas party, but he is your boss. You really are helpless. Yu do need your job. You are angry that your daughter has suffered, but... Your suffering is secondary. Her suffering is primary. She is bruised between the legs and can't sit down for long periods of time. She is frightened of boys at school. She can't sing in the church choir any more because the rapist faithfully attends every sunday. She always wants someone with her (a woman) when she goes downtown. Sure, you feel angry. But that is all you feel. Always someone will raise the issue of men as victims of sexual violence. It does happen. But it is different. I challenge you to find the man who suffers the same mental, emotional, and physical agony that a woman feels. Most male rapes happen between men. Usually it is a straight man raping a gay man, to prove his hatred of queers, to dominate, to ensure his own almighty and all power-ful masculinity. Rape is power and the powerful rape the weak. Men are rapists, and rapists are men. Women are not the ruling sex, we are the oppressed. To focus disproportionate time and attention on the sexual abuse of men is to minimize the reality of the 100's and 1000's of women assaulted each day. To address the issue of women raping men is absurd. It is continued effort to deny men's complicitousness in the sexism which produces crimes against women. You say that you are not a rapist. You do not rape. But you may tol-erate sexist jokes. You may buy pornography, You may interupt a woman at a meeting, you may scoff at the attempts of feminist to hold a rally, you may demand that your (do you own her) girlfriend not go to that rally. And I say where do you draw the line? Can she go to a support group? Can she go to a self-defense class, to volunteer for the rape crisis line. Can she go shopping alone? Can she vote? Just what exactly can she do? With or without your