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FMS Digest, v. 1, issues 1-5, February - July 1941
v.1:no.2: Page 6
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Page 6 F M Z DIGEST CONFIDENTIAL NOTES ON EDITORS By Bob Tucker Condensed from SPACEWAYS March, 1941 (Prologue: The Anniversary issue of SPACEWAYS featured some outstanding items of humor, even if Editor Warner did fail to identify them as such. I am referring to the articles by Editor Campbell and Editor Weisinger. How I grinned and leered as their innocent-sounding words stretched across the page to create the illusion of work, work, work! I plan to reveal here what actually takes place in the offices of an editor during any work day.--The Author.) Campbell's remarks as to the care and caution exercised over submitted manuscripts is humorous to the extreme. Come, come now, old chap... Let me tell you of a certain Monday-- I decided to drop up to Unk's offices. Pushing open the outer door I found no one in sight except Prunella Twitchet, Campbell's secretary. Upon ascertaining who I was, she dropped the pretense of being furiously busy, and motioned with a laconic thumb toward a closed door. On the inside, under a dim light, squatted Campbell, Ezekiah of Love Book and Grubach of Shadow shooting craps. Trimble of Wild West Weekly was out of the game, broke. As to money, either they were all broke or they didn't believe in using it with one another. They were playing with paper-clipped manuscripts. "H'lo, Tucker," Campbell said as I walked in. "Wanna get in the game? What 'cha got under your arm?" "'The Ant from Hell'," I snaps back. "A red-hot serial of torried passion among the clicking mandibles." "Hmmm," opines Campbell, knitting his brows without losing a purl. "Well, it's worth about six bucks in blue chips." Campbell either is exceedingly lucky or owns the dice. Pretty soon the game broke up and the other editors filed out, leaving him in possession of all their western and love stories. All I came away with was a short filler from Wild West Weekly. Jack Woodford claims that some editors use 'scripts for beer-pads. Many a poor author has received back from Astounding or Unknown his 'script burned full of cigaret holes, or saturated with spilled gin. During the recent World Series we used up some twenty-odd pages keeping tabs and notes on the games. Weisinger maintains that mankind is rapidly improving, especially in intelligence. To prove this, he has sent out call after call for manuscripts from people living west of the Hudson river. And so Weisinger arranged all these manuscripts in his office, and beside the manuscripts rests Mort's own chart proving that the great mass of people in the midwest and west have learned to read and write and spell; and the manuscripts are documentary proof! (Gnaedinger) couldn't, of course, let you in on the real method of choosing stories. No, I was up to her office one day and watched her throw darts at a target pinned to the well. All over the target were names of stories available. But she made me promise not to tell. IF From THE READER AND COLLECTOR March, 1941 If you are unable to carry on for a period of at least one volume (6 or 12 issues) with very few subscriptions---- If you don't have the necessary equipment to turn out a legible and easily-read magazine---- If you don't have the time or ability to properly edit a magazine and to reduce the typographical errors to a minimum---- If you don't have enough interesting material to enable you to run the magazine for a reasonable subscription period with very little additional assistance---- If you are unable to maintain a definite publication date--- THEN FOR GAWD'S SAKES DON'T START A SUBSCRIPTION MAGAZINE
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Page 6 F M Z DIGEST CONFIDENTIAL NOTES ON EDITORS By Bob Tucker Condensed from SPACEWAYS March, 1941 (Prologue: The Anniversary issue of SPACEWAYS featured some outstanding items of humor, even if Editor Warner did fail to identify them as such. I am referring to the articles by Editor Campbell and Editor Weisinger. How I grinned and leered as their innocent-sounding words stretched across the page to create the illusion of work, work, work! I plan to reveal here what actually takes place in the offices of an editor during any work day.--The Author.) Campbell's remarks as to the care and caution exercised over submitted manuscripts is humorous to the extreme. Come, come now, old chap... Let me tell you of a certain Monday-- I decided to drop up to Unk's offices. Pushing open the outer door I found no one in sight except Prunella Twitchet, Campbell's secretary. Upon ascertaining who I was, she dropped the pretense of being furiously busy, and motioned with a laconic thumb toward a closed door. On the inside, under a dim light, squatted Campbell, Ezekiah of Love Book and Grubach of Shadow shooting craps. Trimble of Wild West Weekly was out of the game, broke. As to money, either they were all broke or they didn't believe in using it with one another. They were playing with paper-clipped manuscripts. "H'lo, Tucker," Campbell said as I walked in. "Wanna get in the game? What 'cha got under your arm?" "'The Ant from Hell'," I snaps back. "A red-hot serial of torried passion among the clicking mandibles." "Hmmm," opines Campbell, knitting his brows without losing a purl. "Well, it's worth about six bucks in blue chips." Campbell either is exceedingly lucky or owns the dice. Pretty soon the game broke up and the other editors filed out, leaving him in possession of all their western and love stories. All I came away with was a short filler from Wild West Weekly. Jack Woodford claims that some editors use 'scripts for beer-pads. Many a poor author has received back from Astounding or Unknown his 'script burned full of cigaret holes, or saturated with spilled gin. During the recent World Series we used up some twenty-odd pages keeping tabs and notes on the games. Weisinger maintains that mankind is rapidly improving, especially in intelligence. To prove this, he has sent out call after call for manuscripts from people living west of the Hudson river. And so Weisinger arranged all these manuscripts in his office, and beside the manuscripts rests Mort's own chart proving that the great mass of people in the midwest and west have learned to read and write and spell; and the manuscripts are documentary proof! (Gnaedinger) couldn't, of course, let you in on the real method of choosing stories. No, I was up to her office one day and watched her throw darts at a target pinned to the well. All over the target were names of stories available. But she made me promise not to tell. IF From THE READER AND COLLECTOR March, 1941 If you are unable to carry on for a period of at least one volume (6 or 12 issues) with very few subscriptions---- If you don't have the necessary equipment to turn out a legible and easily-read magazine---- If you don't have the time or ability to properly edit a magazine and to reduce the typographical errors to a minimum---- If you don't have enough interesting material to enable you to run the magazine for a reasonable subscription period with very little additional assistance---- If you are unable to maintain a definite publication date--- THEN FOR GAWD'S SAKES DON'T START A SUBSCRIPTION MAGAZINE
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