DIY History | Transcribe | Hevelin Fanzines | Necromancer, v. 1, issue 1, July 1947

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Necromancer, v. 1, issue 1, July 1947

Page 5

FANDOM GAVE HOLLAND'S TIME MACHINE THE HORSE LAFF ---- SINCE THEN HE HAS DISAPPEARED.
A SERIAL IN TWO (THREE?) PARTS

I think I can claim the dubious honor of knowing Holland better than anyone -- not that I actually consider it an honor; he was a Schmo in more ways than one. You see, he was a hard man to know. Sort of queer. That is to say, convention would deem him so, although in the eccentric realm of fandom, on the whole he was taken to be quite normal. 

Holland was a typical fan and had the usual quota of extraordinary ideas peculiar to fen. One of his more infamous fiascos, was his now reknowned Bald Man Plan. The old timers will remember that one. It received quite a bit of notoriety at the time in the various fanzines. His idea was to exchange the skin tissue of the head and jaw so that bald men would never have to shave and would always sport a full head of beard!

He was continually popping up with some prodigious outrage of a similar nature. He worked on the theory that, sooner or later, he would hit upon something practical, and perhaps make himself a few clams.

Because of his sudden disappearance, and the rapid turnover of active fans in fandom since the war, I venture to say that there are few now who remember Holland. Those vetfans who are fortunate enough to have copies of his early fan mag, FAN ANTI, will have no trouble recalling him, though.

In an article in one of his 'zines (now a scare collector's item) years ago, he seriously claimed to have actually constructed a device capable of time-travel, and insisted that he had made a number of sojurns into the past and future by use of the machine. 

As can be well imagined, his article created wuite a furor throughout fandom, and although he was denounced from far and near, and many a descriptive profanity was hurled in his direction, he tenaciously stuck to his claim.

To give substance to the authenticity of his story, he offered to swear on a stack of THE BOOKS OF CHARLES FORT, his chosen bible, that he had done it, and that all he had proclaimed was true.

Naturally, proof, by way of demonstration, was demanded by one and all. The reader may remember his answer to that. He announced in the subsequent issue of FAN ANTI that on his final trip into future, (the year 2305 A.D.) his machine was confiscated by the native "Combinationists" of that time, for a museum piece, and that he was projected back into his own era via methods devised by that world wide race, the machinations of which he could not comprehend. He claimed that the "Combos", (as he dubbed them) had made great scientific strides soon after the devastating war of 2009 when the remaining peoples of the earth decided to fuse all races by the employment of artificial insemination. His puny 20th century knowledge of physics, he said, was so feebly inadequate that he couldn't possibly understand their method of time transportation.

Of course, a big whoop and holler, vehement sarcasm and a great chorus of horse laffs went up from all sides. There was much talk of ostracizing him

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FANDOM GAVE HOLLAND'S TIME MACHINE THE HORSE LAFF ---- SINCE THEN HE HAS DISAPPEARED. A SERIAL IN TWO (THREE?) PARTS I think I can claim the dubious honor of knowing Holland better than anyone -- not that I actually consider it an honor; he was a Schmo in more ways than one. You see, he was a hard man to know. Sort of queer. That is to say, convention would deem him so, although in the eccentric realm of fandom, on the whole he was taken to be quite normal. Holland was a typical fan and had the usual quota of extraordinary ideas peculiar to fen. One of his more infamous fiascos, was his now reknowned Bald Man Plan. The old timers will remember that one. It received quite a bit of notoriety at the time in the various fanzines. His idea was to exchange the skin tissue of the head and jaw so that bald men would never have to shave and would always sport a full head of beard! He was continually popping up with some prodigious outrage of a similar nature. He worked on the theory that, sooner or later, he would hit upon something practical, and perhaps make himself a few clams. Because of his sudden disappearance, and the rapid turnover of active fans in fandom since the war, I venture to say that there are few now who remember Holland. Those vetfans who are fortunate enough to have copies of his early fan mag, FAN ANTI, will have no trouble recalling him, though. In an article in one of his 'zines (now a scare collector's item) years ago, he seriously claimed to have actually constructed a device capable of time-travel, and insisted that he had made a number of sojurns into the past and future by use of the machine. As can be well imagined, his article created wuite a furor throughout fandom, and although he was denounced from far and near, and many a descriptive profanity was hurled in his direction, he tenaciously stuck to his claim. To give substance to the authenticity of his story, he offered to swear on a stack of THE BOOKS OF CHARLES FORT, his chosen bible, that he had done it, and that all he had proclaimed was true. Naturally, proof, by way of demonstration, was demanded by one and all. The reader may remember his answer to that. He announced in the subsequent issue of FAN ANTI that on his final trip into future, (the year 2305 A.D.) his machine was confiscated by the native "Combinationists" of that time, for a museum piece, and that he was projected back into his own era via methods devised by that world wide race, the machinations of which he could not comprehend. He claimed that the "Combos", (as he dubbed them) had made great scientific strides soon after the devastating war of 2009 when the remaining peoples of the earth decided to fuse all races by the employment of artificial insemination. His puny 20th century knowledge of physics, he said, was so feebly inadequate that he couldn't possibly understand their method of time transportation. Of course, a big whoop and holler, vehement sarcasm and a great chorus of horse laffs went up from all sides. There was much talk of ostracizing him PAGE 5