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Comet, v. 1, issue 1, January-February 1940
Page 13
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REVIVAL of SFN in 3501 :--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--: -- by karl himmle -- New York, N.Y. Jun 22, 3501. To inaugurate the New Year, the National Foo-ographic Sassiety has made known to the general public an Astounding discovery. Early last May, one of its members came upon a rusty tobacco can while digging for worms in his garden. Seeing many strange inscriptions on the outside, he brought it to his chief, and together they sat down to decipher it. Only last night, they came to the end of their efforts. They discovered that their paper was covered with one tiny word, "sfn". The names of these enterprising savants are, the discoverer, Sum Mousequicks and the chief, John X. Torottsi. No doubt we shall hear more from these great men. Trottsi was at a loss as to what to do, when a brilliant idea came to him; open the can. He did so and he found five sheets of paper wrappers and a tiny square of typewritten words. They were, "Look under the cornerstone of the Umpire Tight Building". This was done and a paste-board box was brought to light. In it was a small magazine. On the cover was printed, "SPECTROHELIOPLANETARIOCOSMICSCIENTIFICIONSITIS, or THE MOST DEADLY DISEASE KNOWN TO THE TWENTIETH CENTURY". In this were stories by fans (as the authors called themselves) and advertisements for other mags. Senator Blatherskithe seized the brochure and read one story. With a demonical howl, he wrote his resignation to the senate upon the back of an old envelope and dashed home to his typewriter where he has been turning out the most horrible stories ever since. Our royal mayor had 1,099,999,001 1/2 copies printed as has sent them all over the country. The craze of feelistory writing has swept the country like wildfire. Already 1009 1/2 new mags have sprung up (the half copies in both cases were in Brooklyn). Some of the new authors are Oscar Zileh 149th, Hoy Ping Pong I, and the royal souse, Fred Pohl 14th. The most humorous mags come from Newark, but of course, the wits are all halved. In closing, I wish to leave this thought with you. If any one mentions Terrettsianism to you, hold your nose. --finis-- --finis--finis--finis-- NOTES .......................................... [Illustration of man walking while reading a newspaper and smiling.] This man is reading the latest pro stf mag. It is newspaper size and features Hop Pong Stix's Marttain Invader. It also has a Bradberry novel. Price 3c. Don't forget to send in your 25c for 3 issues of THE COMET. This man put it off, new look at him! [Illustration of a man looking at his watch while pointing at his head with a question mark over it.] Do you like these notes? We have to fill the space somehow.
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REVIVAL of SFN in 3501 :--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--:--: -- by karl himmle -- New York, N.Y. Jun 22, 3501. To inaugurate the New Year, the National Foo-ographic Sassiety has made known to the general public an Astounding discovery. Early last May, one of its members came upon a rusty tobacco can while digging for worms in his garden. Seeing many strange inscriptions on the outside, he brought it to his chief, and together they sat down to decipher it. Only last night, they came to the end of their efforts. They discovered that their paper was covered with one tiny word, "sfn". The names of these enterprising savants are, the discoverer, Sum Mousequicks and the chief, John X. Torottsi. No doubt we shall hear more from these great men. Trottsi was at a loss as to what to do, when a brilliant idea came to him; open the can. He did so and he found five sheets of paper wrappers and a tiny square of typewritten words. They were, "Look under the cornerstone of the Umpire Tight Building". This was done and a paste-board box was brought to light. In it was a small magazine. On the cover was printed, "SPECTROHELIOPLANETARIOCOSMICSCIENTIFICIONSITIS, or THE MOST DEADLY DISEASE KNOWN TO THE TWENTIETH CENTURY". In this were stories by fans (as the authors called themselves) and advertisements for other mags. Senator Blatherskithe seized the brochure and read one story. With a demonical howl, he wrote his resignation to the senate upon the back of an old envelope and dashed home to his typewriter where he has been turning out the most horrible stories ever since. Our royal mayor had 1,099,999,001 1/2 copies printed as has sent them all over the country. The craze of feelistory writing has swept the country like wildfire. Already 1009 1/2 new mags have sprung up (the half copies in both cases were in Brooklyn). Some of the new authors are Oscar Zileh 149th, Hoy Ping Pong I, and the royal souse, Fred Pohl 14th. The most humorous mags come from Newark, but of course, the wits are all halved. In closing, I wish to leave this thought with you. If any one mentions Terrettsianism to you, hold your nose. --finis-- --finis--finis--finis-- NOTES .......................................... [Illustration of man walking while reading a newspaper and smiling.] This man is reading the latest pro stf mag. It is newspaper size and features Hop Pong Stix's Marttain Invader. It also has a Bradberry novel. Price 3c. Don't forget to send in your 25c for 3 issues of THE COMET. This man put it off, new look at him! [Illustration of a man looking at his watch while pointing at his head with a question mark over it.] Do you like these notes? We have to fill the space somehow.
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