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Pogorus, v. 1, issue 1, 1942
Page 31
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ALERT FOR PLANTING SEASON by JOE FORTIER It is a little late to plant certain things, but the season is not yet completed. For instance there will be some planting of roots[[?]] -- a year-round practice -- vines, grain, and corn -- the latter two making gag writers no exception. Now not to be swiss[[?]], you should plant certain crops. Inasmuch as the Jays will be planting eggs if they get the chance, it would be good to set out the following air-raid precautions[[?]] in some fertile field and bear fruit from the government grape vine. In air-raids, first of all one must remain calm. Day raid or night raid, STAY CALM. Certain rules are outlined for the use of water. Keep a pitcher full of the stuff. You will need to water the plants, save the canary[[?]], cool your feet. Perhaps you may even DRINK it on occasion. Now, most of the raids come at night, so put out your lamps. If they're all shut down tight, leave them that way. Cover the windows well. In addition to the accepted things, this will keep out the Jay eggs if they land nearby. They hatch very easily. One should arrange a blackout room, one that will take plenty of punishment. Have a sturdy table handy. You'll need a mattress as well. Which reminds me that you should get all the wife and children into the room, too. Above all, save your wife. Children first, perhaps, but she'll know what to do. After all, you may need entertainment. You might take a deck
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ALERT FOR PLANTING SEASON by JOE FORTIER It is a little late to plant certain things, but the season is not yet completed. For instance there will be some planting of roots[[?]] -- a year-round practice -- vines, grain, and corn -- the latter two making gag writers no exception. Now not to be swiss[[?]], you should plant certain crops. Inasmuch as the Jays will be planting eggs if they get the chance, it would be good to set out the following air-raid precautions[[?]] in some fertile field and bear fruit from the government grape vine. In air-raids, first of all one must remain calm. Day raid or night raid, STAY CALM. Certain rules are outlined for the use of water. Keep a pitcher full of the stuff. You will need to water the plants, save the canary[[?]], cool your feet. Perhaps you may even DRINK it on occasion. Now, most of the raids come at night, so put out your lamps. If they're all shut down tight, leave them that way. Cover the windows well. In addition to the accepted things, this will keep out the Jay eggs if they land nearby. They hatch very easily. One should arrange a blackout room, one that will take plenty of punishment. Have a sturdy table handy. You'll need a mattress as well. Which reminds me that you should get all the wife and children into the room, too. Above all, save your wife. Children first, perhaps, but she'll know what to do. After all, you may need entertainment. You might take a deck
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